Puppy Love

I know everyone already knows this, but I absolutely love my dog, Bailey. I just couldn't keep blogging without devoting a blog post to her.

We have had Bailey for almost 4 years now. I still remember the day we went to get her. I wanted a dog so bad - Dan... not so much. I had begged and begged and promised everything under the sun in order to get a dog. Dan wasn't really interested. He had all kinds of reasons - they tear up the house, we didn't have time... the list went on and on. But I was persistent and of course he finally gave in!

We did a ton of research. We wanted a dog that would be good with kids, was a larger breed, didn't shed, and wasn't territorial.After a lot of deliberation, we landed on Labs. We looked online and saw a couple ads in newspapers. We even went to look at a couple litters, but nothing really stuck. I was beginning to worry that we weren't really going to get a dog.

Then Dan found an ad in the newspaper from a breeder and we made an appointment to go see it. For me, it was love at first sight. As soon as I saw her, I knew she was ours. Dan wasn't quite convinced. Bailey was 5 months old at the time. She had been bought by a family who had a baby at home. When they took her home, they realized the baby was allergic to dogs, so they had to bring her back. Now, because she was a little older, they were having a hard time finding her a home.

After a little convincing and finding out that she was already house trained, we agreed that she was the one we wanted. She was already named Bailey and we didn't want to confuse her, so we kept the name.

The night we took her home, we didn't have anything for her - no crate or dish or food. I guess we really weren't expecting to get a dog. On the way home, she peed in the back of my car. I thought Dan was going to turn around and take her back. Maybe he would have if it had been his car! :)

There have been some struggles - like when she peed on our bed twice or when she would get out and we would spend hours wandering the neighborhood trying to find her, but mostly it is good. I love her so so much. I talk to her like she's a person and I swear she understands every word I say. She is great with the kids in our family and everyday she makes me smile. Sometimes Dan says that I love Bailey more than him... it's a tough call sometimes :)

Under the Sea

Last weekend the Greater Cleveland Aquarium opened. I have been patiently awaiting the arrival of the aquarium. I love love love aquariums! If I visit a city that has an aquarium, you better believe I will be dragging whoever I am with there to see it. I don't know why I love them so much... I just do!

We took yesterday and today off work and Dan was so excited to take me to the aquarium one of the days. What a wonderful husband he is... he doesn't even like them! Anyways, we decided to bring Gabby along with us... even though she had already gone to the aquarium once this week. We knew she would be a blast! I wish my nephews were around so we could take them. Now that would be a blast!

Here are just a few pictures from the day!

Home Sweet Home?

You are now looking out what could potentially be our new home!!!

We made an offer tonight, so we'll see what happens! :)

Just keep your fingers crossed for us and imagine hanging out and drinking coronas by our pool!

Like music to my ears...

I love music. I mean, I really really love music. All different kinds. I have an addiction - I am constantly on Itunes - they would probably go under without me. I am always looking for new music. One of my favorite things is to go to the library and check out Cd's - free music and I get to check out a lot of new things!

I am constantly listening to music - all day at work, at home, at the grocery store, at the mall... I always have my Iphone and Ipod fully charged and ready to go and headphones with me at all times. I just don't feel like myself if a day goes by and I don't get to listen to music for at least 30 minutes.

Dan always jokes around with me that I ONLY listen to hip hop music. He says it's the ghetto in me. I argue with him all the time - it's just not true. I always say, "Just look at my itunes!" 5000+ songs and trust me, not even half of them are hip hop songs. I just prefer hip hop for things like working out and cleaning.

I thought I would share a playlist I have on my Iphone and Ipod touch. It is called "Forever Faves" - my absolute most favorite songs. No matter how many times I listen to them they never ever get old. If I am having a bad day, these songs are guaranteed to brighten them. I will let you judge for yourself if all I listen to is Hip Hop...

My "Forever Faves" in no particular order:
1. Ain't Too Proud to Beg - Temptations
2. Hook - Blues Traveler
3. Magic Stick - 50 Cent & Lil Kim
4. Love is a Battlefield - Pat Benatar
5. One Headlight - Wallflowers
6. The Difference - Wallflowers
7. Just Like Heaven - The Cure
8. Interstate Love Song - Stone Temple Pilots
9. Accidentally In Love - Counting Crows
10. Satellite - DMB
11. Crush - DMB
12. Steady as We Go - DMB
13. Hustler Musik - Lil Wayne
14. Semi Charmed Life - Third Eye Blind
15. Lights - Journey
16. Cracklin Rosie - Neil Diamond
17. Forever in Blue Jeans - Neil Diamond
18. Don't Stop Believing - Journey
19. River Deep, Mountain High - Tina & Ike Turner
20. Back to Black - Amy Winehouse
21. I'm Not Ok - My Chemical Romance
22. Float On - Modest Mouse
23. When You Were Young - The Killers
24. Can't Leave Him Alone - Ciara
25. Born Too Late - The Clarks
26. If I Can't - 50 Cent
27. Cleaning Out My Closet - Eminem
28. More Than A Woman - Aaliyah
29. Only Want to Be With You - Hootie & The Blowfish
30. Her Diamonds - Rob Thomas
31. Mad World - Gary Jules
32. #1 - Nelly
33. Come on Eileen - Dexy's Midnight Runners
34. Bad Girl - Danity Kane
35. I Love a Rainy Night - Eddie Rabbit
36. Ready or Not - Fugees
37. #1 Crush - Garbage
38. Maneater - Hall & Oats
39. Breaking Your Mind - Jack Johnson
40. Losing Hope - Jack Johnson
41. Dirt Off Your Shoulder - Jay Z
42. Upgrade You - Beyonce
43. Ego - Beyonce
44. Black Horse & The Cherry Tree - KT Tunstall

So there they are... my 44 absolute favorite songs -

Cow Tales and Toblerones

This year, Dan and I have been together for 5 years. Ah! Where has the time gone! Dan is one of the greatest things that have ever happened to me. I love him and all of the time we have spent together. I have so many wonderful memories and I can't wait to make more!
Over the past 5 years Dan and I have settled into some of our own traditions. I love traditions. I love the stability of them. I had a rough childhood (a whole other blog), and never really had a lot of traditions growing up. So, I love that we have started making our own traditions that we will be able to continue with our children someday.

One of our traditions is our Christmas Eve. Every year, we make a nice dinner, always filet and twice baked potatoes and after dinner we do our Christmas together.

After dinner we sit down to open presents, always stockings first. There may be different little things in our stockings, but one thing is always the same. I always put Toblerones in Dan's and he always puts Cow Tales in mine.

This year while we were opening our presents we started talking about why we like these candies so much. I explained to Dan that when I was a child growing up in Youngstown, I would always walk with my biological father to gas station down the street so that he could buy cigarettes and beer. He would always let me buy either a Cow Tale or a Moon Pie. I loved the little treat and it made everything seem not so bad.
I asked Dan why he liked Toblerones. He said that the first time he had them, he was on a family vacation. They were at a nice hotel and he asked his Dad if he could have them out of the mini bar. He has loved them ever since.
He laughs and tells me I'm ghetto. I laugh and tell him he's a snob.

We laugh about how different our lives were growing up. It's amazing that we found each other. But I'm glad we did.

Happy 2012!

Happy New Years!

A new year...
A fresh start...
everyone filled with hope and optimism.

I have been reading everyone's resolutions on Facebook, but I hadn't taken the time to think of any for myself. I thought I better get on it!

So, for 2012, I resolve to:
- Eat healthier
- run a 1/2 marathon
- work on our financials
- make more crafts
- learn to sew

I have a feeling it is going to be a great year!

Merry Christmas!

Yes, I said it...
Not -  "Happy Holidays"
Not -  "Seasons Greetings"

Merry Christmas!

I don't know why there was such an uproar this year about it, but it is all I heard about. Apparently it is no longer politically correct to mention Christmas outside of the confines of your own home.

Wouldn't want to make anyone feel bad.

Wouldn't want to offend anyone.

I must have missed something.

When did it become offensive for people to have differences? When did it become offensive to become tolerant of other people's beliefs and customs? Is it too much for people to hear me say "Merry Christmas"? Will this phrase cause mass rioting and global chaos?

I am a believer in being tolerant of other people's religions, beliefs, customs and overall diversity. I think it is good for us as people to know more about the world going on without us. It makes us better people - allows us to see the world differently. Instead, it is almost as if we want to turn everyone and everything into a cookie cutter clone. No differences. Nothing to stand out. Nothing to show who you are.

I celebrate Christmas. If you don't, that's ok. When I greet you with a "Merry Christmas", just send a Happy Hanukkah back my way. I won't be offended, I promise.

I don't want to hide my beliefs and I don't want you to have to hide yours. We can all just get along.

So with that said...

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

Finding Meaning and Happiness - Part II

I know that you have all been dying to see the follow-up to my blog from yesterday. You probably weren't able to sleep last night. Am I right? :)

Well, I won't keep you waiting any longer!

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46. What’s something that’s harder for you than it is for most people?
Trusting people and letting people get too close to my heart.

47. What are the top three qualities you look for in a friend?
Honesty, acceptance of me, even with all my flaws, and someone who I can laugh with.

48. If you had a friend who spoke to you in the same way that you sometimes speak to yourself, how long would you allow that person to be your friend?
Ha - I would probably cut them immediately :) I am pretty hard on myself.

49. When you think of ‘home,’ what, specifically, do you think of?
A safe, comfortable place where I can come home, take my pants off and be myself :)

50. What’s the most valuable thing you own?
If we are talking about just an object - it would be my engagement ring - the main diamond in it came from Dan's grandmother's ring. It is valuable monetarily as well as emotionally.

51. If you had to move 3000 miles away, what would you miss most?
Friends and Family

52. What would make you smile right now?
A glass of wine and a bubble bath

53. What do you do when nothing else seems to make you happy?
Put music on really loud, dance around and sing at the top of my lungs

54. What do you wish did not exist in your life?
In my whole life... I wish that I did not have the memories of my childhood that I do. In my life right now, I wish that I was stress free.

55. What should you avoid to improve your life?
Negative self talk

56. What is something you would hate to go without for a day?
Starbucks Chai Tea Lattes... oh, and I guess Dan

57. What’s the biggest lie you once believed was true?
Santa Claus...

58. What’s something bad that happened to you that made you stronger?
The first 12 years of my life... but that's a whole other novel.

59. What’s something nobody could ever steal from you?
My fight... I will never let myself give up

60. What’s something you disliked when you were younger that you truly enjoy today?
The History Channel

61. What are you glad you quit?
Trying to make everyone else happy by being someone I'm not.

62. What do you need to spend more time doing?
Working out! Hehe.
Taking to to reflect on all the blessings I have and spending a little more quality time at church.

63. What are you naturally good at?
I don't really feel like I'm naturally good at anything. But I work really hard to be good at things - like photography and baking.

64. What have you been counting or keeping track of recently?
My blessings and everything I have to be grateful for.

65. What has the little voice inside your head been saying lately?
That anything is possible

66. What’s something you should always be careful with?
Someones heart

67. What should always be taken seriously?
commitments, vows and promises

68. What should never be taken seriously?
You should never take yourself too seriously. You should always be able to laugh at yourself.

69. What are three things you can’t get enough of?
Love, Happiness, Laughter

70. What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you?
I can't even think of anything that I would do differently.

71. What fascinates you?
I am truly fascinated by how human nature has changed over time - how people interact with each other, how people act, the things they say

72. What’s the difference between being alive and truly living?
To me, being alive is just that - you are breathing, your heart beating, etc., but just going with the flow - not really adding to the world or getting much out of it. If you are just alive, you will look back and wonder where all the time went. Living is experiences, seeking to achieve your dreams, failing, succeeding, gaining experience and wisdom, laying on your death bed with absolutely no regrets.

73. What’s something you would do every day if you could?
Read. I absolutely love getting lost in books.

74. At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive?
After the 1/2 marathon that we did... it was so invigorating, so humbling - it was crazy to get so much out of a 13 mile run.

75. Which is worse, failing or never trying?
Never trying... because you'll never know

76. What makes you feel incomplete?
Feeling like I have no idea where I come from

77. When did you experience a major turning point in your life?
During my first year of college I was an emotional train wreck. After nearly failing out of college, it really hit me that I am responsible for my life - for my failure and successes - and that I could be someone in this world.

78. What or who do you wish you lived closer to?
I wish I lived closer to Kim and I wish that I lived closer to AJ, Stacy, Colin & Brenny.

79. If you had the opportunity to get a message across to a large group of people, what would your message be?
That it is not our place to judge people - we need to accept people as they are and not judge them and try to make them who we want them to be.

80. What’s something you know you can count on?
I know I can count on my friends and family supporting me no matter what I do... They love me :)

81. What makes you feel comfortable?
joking around


my appreciation for all the good in my life

83. What will be different about your life in exactly one year?
Hopefully a lot ;)

84. What mistakes do you make over and over again?
Some people might think it is a mistake, but I don't - I always look to find the good in people, no matter what.

85. What do you have a hard time saying “no” to?
I have a hard time saying no at work. I take on a lot of extra because no matter how hard I try I can't seem to make myself say no.

86. Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing?
I would have to say that I feel like I was settling before with my full time job, but that I am now moving towards doing what I believe in with my photography.

87. What’s something that used to scare you, but no longer does?
Being married - I used to think maybe I wasn't cut out to be committed to just one person - that maybe I was screwed up when it came to relationships because I always got restless. Now I wouldn't have it any other way!

88. What promise to yourself do you still need to fulfill?
That I will take everything I have learned in my life and be the best possible mother that I can be someday.

89. What do you appreciate most about your current situation?
That I have room to grow and learn as a person.

90. What’s something simple that makes you smile?
Listening to Bailey snore

91. So far, what has been the primary focus of your life?
My career

92. How do you know when it’s time to move on?
When I have gotten to a point when I am no longer inspired by what I am doing

93. What’s something you wish you could do one more time?
This is going to sound silly, but I wish I could go back to college times and go to one more frat party with my friends, get drunk and dance the night away

94. When you’re 90-years-old, what will matter to you the most?
My family

95. What would you regret not fully doing, being, or having in your life?
I would regret not following my dreams, no being the best person I can be, and not having a life full of love and laughter.

Finding Meaning and Happiness Part I

My friend Lindsey has turned me on to this really great blog that has really got me thinking. It's called Marc and Angel Hack Life - Practical Tips for Productive Living (Link to Blog). I have been reading it and it today and it really has had me thinking about a lot of different things.

One of the blogs from earlier this months is called, "95 Questions to Help You Find Meaning and Happiness". I started reading it and then I looked at the clock and thought, "Wow, it's getting late - I should probably log onto my work computer and get some things done." Um.....

Yeah... maybe I need to start searching for some new meaning and happiness... :)

So I decided to answer some of the questions... which is really just me putting off the inevitable because I know that at some point tonight that laptop needs to be turned on.

1. In one sentence, who are you?
I am a happily married woman with an amazing husband, awesome pup, great family and friends and a wonderfully blessed life even though I think I maybe work a little too much.

2. Why do you matter?
That's a tough question. I'm not sure why I matter... I just try to bring love and laughter to those around me.

3. What is your life motto?
An easy one! Illegitimus non carborundum - don't let the bastards grind you down!

4. What’s something you have that everyone wants?
I am not sure that I have something that everyone wants...

5. What is missing in your life?
I think something that is missing in my life is maybe my relationship with God - I know it used to be stronger and I know I haven't been putting in much work on my end.

6. What’s been on your mind most lately?
Babies! :)

7. Happiness is a ________?
emotion that you have to constantly work towards.

8. What stands between you and happiness?
Sometimes I stand in the way of my own happiness by doubting myself or not making the necessary changes that I might need to.

9. What do you need most right now?
More sleep... more time in the day... more money :)

10. What does the child inside you long for?
A warm summer day of running and laughing and not having a care in the world!

11. What is one thing right now that you are totally sure of?
My love for my husband.

12. What’s been bothering you lately?
Work! It is so frustrating sometimes!

13. What are you scared of?
Failing at everything I do.

14. What has fear of failure stopped you from doing?
It usually doesn't stop me from doing something... just makes the road a little bumpy.

15. What will you never give up on?
My dreams

16. What do you want to remember forever?
The way I felt on my wedding day - like for once in my life everything was as it should be.

17. What makes you feel secure?
Knowing that I have my husband, family and friends who will always be there for me.

18. Which activities make you lose track of time?
Crafts, Photography, Working Out

19. What’s the most difficult decision you’ve ever made?
I'm not sure that I have ever had to make a really difficult decision.

20. What’s the best decision you’ve ever made?
To marry my husband

21. What are you most grateful for?
Family and Friends

22. What is worth the pain?
Love, Life

23. In order of importance, how would you rank: happiness, money, love, health, fame?
love, health, happiness, money, fame

24. What is something you’ve always wanted, but don’t yet have?
A house (our house now is technically my husband's house and I didn't get to help pick it out)

25. What was the most defining moment in your life during this past year?
When we decided we were ready to start thinking about babies - changes your whole perspective on life.

26. What’s the number one change you need to make in your life in the next twelve months?
To get in shape/ healthy so that I can live a long and happy life

27. What’s the number one thing you want to achieve in the next five years?
I would like my own photography studio and a happy, healthy family

28. What is the biggest motivator in your life right now?
My future kids

29. What will you never do?
say never

30. What’s something you said you’d never do, but have since done?
I can't even think of anything.

31. What’s something new you recently learned about yourself?
That I actually do have some creative talents :)

32. What do you sometimes pretend to understand that you really do not?
Haha - sometimes when people talk to me I zone out, but pretend like I heard everything they said. I blame Georgia for this.

33. In one sentence, what do you wish for your future self?
I wish that whatever I decide I want to do with my life that I work hard to achieve.

34. What worries you most about the future?
The uncertainty

35. When you look into the past, what do you miss most?
Friends from high school

36. What’s something from the past that you don’t miss at all?
My biological parents

37. What recently reminded you of how fast time flies?
That we need to start planning our 10 year class reunion.

38. What is the biggest challenge you face right now?
Building my photography business

39. In one word, how would you describe your personality?
Bubbly

40. What never fails to frustrate you?
My mother

41. What are you known for by your friends and family?
making jokes and taking whiskey to the face :)

42. What’s something most people don’t know about you?
That I grew up in Youngstown, OH and if you mess with me I will cut you...
Just kidding... I wouldn't cut anyone...
also, I don't like to wear pants

43. What’s a common misconception people have about you?
That I can't take anything seriously.

44. What’s something a lot of people do that you disagree with?
Smoke

45. What’s a belief you hold with which many people disagree?
I am pro-choice and I believe in gay marriage

Part II tomorrow!

Giving Tree

This year at work we had a Holiday Giving committee. In October we do a lot of fundraising for the United Way, the main charity that my company supports, but our office wanted to do something during the holidays to give back to the community.  This is the first year we have done this in my 5 years, so I was really excited to be a part of it.

We decided on "Adopt a Family" an organization in Cleveland where people apply to have their family adopted for gifts for the holidays. They help out in the community all year long - gathering donations of furniture, food, clothes, books, etc. It is a great organization that really touches a lot of people in Cleveland who need the help.

We chose to adopt 2 families. Our two families ended up being related - 2 single mothers who were cousins, one with 3 kids and the other with 4. The one family had lost their home due to a house fire a few months back, so they were all living together. The families submitted their "wish list" and we got to work raising money and creating our Giving Tree so that people in the office could pick gifts to purchase for the families.

About a week ago, as we were wrapping everything up, I heard someone at the office making a comment about how ridiculous it was that we were helping these people who weren't doing anything to help themselves. I was absolutely disgusted! Keep in mind that we don't know anything about these people except for their ages and the little bit of information I already wrote - that they were cousins and they lived together due to a house fire. I wanted to say something to this person so bad, but I didn't want to cause unnecessary drama at work.

As I was driving home from work, I couldn't stop thinking about what the person had said. The more I thought about it, I could kind of understand where the person was coming from. These are two young women - both in the early 20's, both with more kids than they can take care of, asking for the public for assistance. Some of the gifts on the list were a little questionable - Ipods and electronics - more wants than needs. I almost started to find myself agreeing with the person... Almost...

At the end of the day, I don't know these women. I don't know what their circumstances are or what brought them to this point of needing assistance. What I do know is that there were 7 children who were not going to have much of a Christmas because their mothers couldn't afford it. They were going to wake up on Christmas with no gifts under the tree. Regardless of what their mothers should be or could be doing or aren't doing, those kids deserve a nice Christmas. It isn't their fault that they are in the situation that they are. When I was growing up, there were many years when there were no Christmas gifts under the tree for us and I remember crying and wondering why Santa didn't stop at my house. I was too young to understand that my parents couldn't afford gifts - I just thought it was because I had done something wrong. I don't want any kids to feel that way.

We delivered the gifts today, completely filling the living room of the small home that housed all 9 people. Our gifts were met with tears, thanks and hugs. It made me feel really good to be a part of something so special. It makes my heart happy to know that when I am opening presents on Christmas morning, there will be 7 kids opening their gifts from "Santa" as well. They will be smiling and joyful. That is what Christmas is about.

Wishing precious time away...

Starting Friday at 5:01pm I am on vacation. I am anticipating that it is going to be a gloriously amazing 10 days off with no cares, worries, or people chewing me out on the phone all day (ah, the life of a claims adjuster... such a special treat). There is going to be lots of holiday celebrating, sleeping, baking/cooking, photography, a Twilight Marathon, a shopping extravaganza and hopefully some working out in there too! Like I said, it is going to be pretty amazing.

Today at work, all I could think about was these 10 work free, stress free days. I couldn't concentrate, counting the minutes until my sweet freedom. Every minute was like an hour - it literally felt as though the day was going to end.

And then I set myself a calendar reminder for January 4, 2012....

2012...
In less than 2 months I will be 28 years old...
6 years since I graduated from college...
10 years since I graduated from high school...

Yikes!

The first thing I thought was - Wow, I am old!

The next thing I thought was - Where has the time gone?

How ironic that as I sat there wondering where all the time has gone I was actively wishing away a week of my life just because I think the next week is going to be better.

Next week is not a guarantee. The next hour isn't even guaranteed. I don't want to live my life thinking the next day, week, month, year is going to be better, only to look back and wonder where all the time went.

It's time to start looking at each day for all the possibilities it has for greatness instead of wishing them all away!

Missing my Christmas Spirit

I love Christmas. I have always loved Christmas. I love the lights, the smells, the food, the way the season makes people act almost out of character and do amazing things for others. For a small period of time, most people find their humanity and remember the reason for the season. It really truly is a magical time of year.

For some reason this year I just have not been able to get into it. I am not sure why. It may be that I have been so busy with work and with the photography business that I haven't really had time to think too much about Christmas. It might be that we haven't really done a while lot of Christmas-y activities this year. It could be that every time we try to find a gift for someone it is either out of stock of the wrong sizes or colors. It could also be that the one thing I wanted for this Christmas I am not getting. Either way, I am just having a hard time getting into the Christmas spirit this year.

I am hoping that in the next week I can find my Christmas magic and get into the spirit! Maybe Santa can bring me some!